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Help with the Ex

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Hpim0309_max50

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Posted over 5 years ago

 

Ok, so I have been going around and around with my ex over the last few months about the information she's entitled to in regards to who my babysitter is. She and I divorced in December 2008 and she gave me full custody of our children after realizing she wasn't going to win the custody battle. We are rapidly approaching her first time for visitation with the kids during this upcoming summer. I have been pressuring her to follow our divorce decree to finally make sure things are suitable for our children to be with her for her visitation period. In turn she continues to pressure me about my babysitter and I'm not to sure as to how much to reveal to her about who she is. It's not that I think my babysitter is someone that I should be ashamed of but, rather that I don't think I can trust my ex-wife not to show up there and try to forcefully take my children. She ran with them once and it's a risk I'm not willing to take again. I live in Ohio and have been trying to find this information out now for like I said, about 3 or 4 months. I am doing my best to avoid attorney's in this what I thought should be a simple matter. After getting taken through the cleaners by them I don't really wish to talk to them any more. Does anybody know what legal obligations I have to my ex in regards to what I have to tell her about my babysitter? I am trying to avoid as much confrontation as possible and don't want to drag my babysitter into what has already been a very messy divorce. Thanks to any and all who have any input or advice.

Tam_and_i_max50

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Rate This | Posted over 5 years ago

 

I don't know anything about Ohio laws, but my advice would be to avoid telling her anything unless a judge tells you have to.  I would tell the babysitter to call the law if your x shows up, so she doesn't have to deal with the x.  Let the law deal with it and if need be they can contact you.

Meangreen01_max50

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Rate This | Posted over 5 years ago

 

Since most of us are not lawyers we probably cannot answer this question well... instead I offer you this link:


www.hcmmlaw.com/blog/


This link will take you to a Ohio Family Law Blog.  It MAY have useful info, but I truly do not know how useful.  Your best bet will be getting a lawyer's advice.


"People sleep peaceably in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf." ~ George Orwell

"Honor First!"

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Newpatch_sq90_max50

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Rate This | Posted over 5 years ago

 

In Colorado you do not haveto disclose who the care provider is, but if the ex is paying child support, they are entitled to a receipt for what is being paid.  I agree with you, it sounds like a set-up.  I would not tell her anything, because there is no reason she needs to know the name of your sitter. You might try calling your child protective services in your area, or Social Services.  Whoever handles child cases in your state.  They might be able to shed some light on your question. 


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Hpim0309_max50

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Rate This | Posted over 5 years ago

 

Thank you for your replies so soon. I will take a look at that link and also get ahold of Social Services. This has been an ongoing problem for a while which I have been able to avoid for sometime but now is becoming harder and harder to ignore. I'm half tempted to tell her to take a flying leap however, I'm trying to maintain a little civility with her. Which trust me isn't much. We don't communicate at all anymore except through e-mails. Phone calls only ever end up in flying tempers and egos. Thanks again. I'm going to take a look into these things. I look forward to any further advice anyone else has as well.

Bearcat_2_max600_max50

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Rate This | Posted over 5 years ago

 

First off, if there's a court order concerning visitation, she's not entitled to know who or where the babysitter is or where the children are.  If she wants to make an issue out of it, let her take it before a judge.  Then, since she's already run off with the children once, I'd request that the court recognize this and forbid her from being anywhere near the babysitter's address.  I'd also be watching my rear view to make sure she doesn't try to follow you over there.  I'm sure babysitter knows to call the cops at the first sign of a problem....  Good luck. 

Hpim0309_max50

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Rate This | Posted over 5 years ago

 

So I spoke with my paralegal and my attorney today. I learned that a non-resident parent has just as much a right as a resident parent does in regards to who is providing care to the children while the resident parent is at work. I think this in part is a load of crap. There is a reason why I don't want her knowing numerous things in my life. One reason being as I stated before is that she ran with my kids once already. But being the law abiding citizen I am I will follow the law as I have already done and continue to do. I just hope that it protects me and my children if things go sour. Thanks to all who replied to this thread.

N1057266179_30110180_6957_max50

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Rate This | Posted over 5 years ago

 

Wow, that's amazing.  I was a legal secretary for many years, and in Florida law the resident parent may have to provide the information, but if they provide the care provider with the divorce decree and proof that they are the custodial parent and remove the non-custodial parent from the pick up list then if for some weird reason that child is removed from the daycare by anyone other than who is on the list, it's kidnapping and both the daycare and the non-custodial parents can be held liable.