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Police Family Life

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Posted almost 7 years ago

 

A discussion about how a police officer's family may be effected by the officer being an officer.

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Rate This | Posted almost 7 years ago

 

I would love to know how many wives are about police being police

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How they feel about it

0930121924_max50

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Rate This | Posted almost 7 years ago

 

Well, my wife can care less if I am a policeman or not. We met before I started working as a officer. Right now, she wants me to go back, I have been off since last Nov, and she wants me to go back for me, not her. Some wives that I see take a big part in their husbands job. Too much as I see it. Some has to know everything about everything and show up at post and think they are apart of the agency because they are married to a officer. They are married badge bunnies, that need to stay at home and let their husbands do the job that they are being paid for. Then their are wives who hate the fact that their husbands are cops due to badge bunnies, work hours and the dedication it takes to do this job. That is why policemen have such a high divorce rates, its one extreme to the next. Thats why I am glade my wife cares less about my job. If you have kids, you better spend every chance with them you can, being out long hours, and the stress takes it toll out on them too. Before you get ready to go out, have yourself mentally ready, vest on, one in the chamber. Kiss the family and do whatever it takes to come home to kiss them again. They never know, and you don't know either if you will ever see them again. Thats the job we wanted, but the family has stress on them just like we do.


I love each day like its my last! Why do we are have to be so serious?

Deadman_pirate_flag_max50

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Rate This | Posted almost 7 years ago

 

My wife and I met after I had been a police officer for four years, so she knew what she was getting before she said "I do". She worries about me alot, but not as much as she used to now that I'm in a plain clothes assignment and off of patrol.

In response to Stalker, while I don't think a wife should show up at a department and hinder an officer's performance of his duties, I do think that they are very much part of the agency. There's an old saying that "behind every good man, there's a great woman", and I think that rings true. I've given my wife a brief tour of my office, and almost all of my coworkers have met her, and we've even all hung out together off duty. I've also met the significant others of several other agents that I work with. I feel that this is an important part of being a police officer, and it bolsters morale at both the office and home, fosters a "family" atmosphere amongst coworkers, and allows the wife to get to know the guys and gals that are watching my back, so that she can rest easier at night. Just because a wife takes an interest in the job isn't a reason to label someone a "badge bunny".

K9_smile_max50

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Rate This | Posted almost 7 years ago

 

What about a wife in LE that shows up at her husbands department?

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Rate This | Posted almost 7 years ago

 

Why is this not in the section called 'Police Family Life?'

Pl_stamp_max50

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Rate This | Posted almost 7 years ago

 

Moved from 'Ask a Cop'.

-GTS197

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Rate This | Posted almost 7 years ago

 

I applied to be a State Trooper here when I was 22 years old. I met my wife a few months after testing and being accepted into the LE Academy. Things happening the way they do, we talked and talked and talked about it and I decided to appease her by not continuing my pursuit of this particular field. I went into the medical field as a Certified Medication Nurse and worked doing that for about 9 years. I bounced around working in lumber mills, a short stint with a Private Investigator in CA, and then onto my current job for the past 6 years. Recently (February) my wife just caved in out of nowhere. She said she could tell that something was missing in my life and she knew what I had always wanted to do. Like Stalker, she wants me to be an officer FOR ME. I have not been one for the past 15 years FOR HER, and she has finally understood that in order for me to have a fulfilling and satisfying life, she is letting me pursue this. As I stated in an earlier post, I feel like a kid in a candy store. Just testing again and interviewing has given me a fresh outlook and perspective on life. Her main concerns are that I am not coming home from my shift. She is scared to death, but working on her fears. I hope that she will eventually just come to accept that it is a job, like any other job, and that it's no big deal. I have spoken with countless officers and friends wearing badges and put the question to them. I have heard all the downsides as well as the positive aspects of the job. I have told my wife to get in touch with Trooper So-and-so's wife and talk to her. Get on P1.com and click on the "wives of officers" link and chat with wives - talk with them. These are things I mull over in my head every time I think about my next step in the process. I want to make a difference in the world, even if it's only here in our neck of the woods. If all you save is one person's life, if all you get is one person off of meth, if all you do is get drunk drivers off the highways, it will be worth every bit of the hard work and long hours. My main concern is my wife and my marriage, and I am willing to work that much harder off-shift to make sure she is secure with our relationship and then to do whatever it takes to make it home every night.

Army_birthday_ball_max50

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Rate This | Posted almost 7 years ago

 

I am extremely proud that my husband is a LEO. We are both soldiers also, so danger isn't new to either of us. He loves serving his country in any sense of the form. I am aware of the dangers of LE and can accept them as long as he is happy. The difference he makes in one life counts for a million.

Face_pic_of_amy_max50

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Rate This | Posted almost 7 years ago

 

I am the wife of a Police Chief and a daughter of a fallen police officer. I always told myself that I would never marry a police officer but look what happened....I fell in-love with one! We meet when he was just a patrol officer and I support him in everyway. It is very important to have the support of your family no matter what career field you are in. Now look....He is Police Chief! I am so proud of my husband and my family! I love you Stacy!

Worntornflag_max50

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Rate This | Posted almost 7 years ago

 

I'm a wife of a police officer. I worry about him everynight that he goes on duty, but I learn to deal with it. I am supportive of anything my husband decides to do. I have gone to his department a couple of times, but I don't go there very often. I have met the police officers he works with, and the ones he considers friends from other department. It has helped to know who the people are that are going to be backing him up. He tells me some of what goes on while he is out, but he also leaves alot out (that I don't need to know). I don't mind that, because I don't want to worry more. But he know he can talk to me if he is upset about anything or needs to talk about the night. I usually don't ask questions, unless I see he is upset and needs to talk. My husband was a firefighter before he we were married, and for awhile after we got married. He became a pollice officer, soon after we were married. I was used to him working in a dangerous job field. He has always wanted to be a police officer, and with my support decided to finally do it. I won't say that I don't have fear about whether he is coming home to his family. But I know he is doing what he loves to do. I'm glad to see he has that, because so many people out there hate their jobs. I hope you all have that too; the love for the job, the support of doing that job, and great people you work with to back you up.

Motor_cop_comic_max160_max50

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Rate This | Posted almost 7 years ago

 

You can never tell...my ex didn't like me being a cop (didn't like me much either, for that matter) but loved cop TV shows!


"You can't lead from behind" Gen'l James Longstreet, CSA

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Rate This | Posted almost 7 years ago

 

I just look at it this way regardless who you are married too (granted being the girlfriend or wife of a LEO, or being the LEO) the fact remains that you may never see them come back through the door they left. Life happens and so do things that change the courses of all our lives. You should kiss the one you love like it is the last time they will ever be kissed before they leave the house.......Fate never let's you know when it will be the last time you speak to someone......so love like there is no tomorrow.........

Worntornflag_max50

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Rate This | Posted almost 7 years ago

 

jroger said:

I just look at it this way regardless who you are married too (granted being the girlfriend or wife of a LEO, or being the LEO) the fact remains that you may never see them come back through the door they left. Life happens and so do things that change the courses of all our lives. You should kiss the one you love like it is the last time they will ever be kissed before they leave the house.......Fate never let's you know when it will be the last time you speak to someone......so love like there is no tomorrow.........

I agree with that. Whenever my husband goes out the door we make sure we told each other I love you. We also make sure that we don't leave or go to bed angry at each other. You just never know.

0930121924_max50

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Rate This | Posted almost 7 years ago

 

CJsGirl said:


jroger said:


I just look at it this way regardless who you are married too (granted being the girlfriend or wife of a LEO, or being the LEO) the fact remains that you may never see them come back through the door they left. Life happens and so do things that change the courses of all our lives. You should kiss the one you love like it is the last time they will ever be kissed before they leave the house.......Fate never let's you know when it will be the last time you speak to someone......so love like there is no tomorrow.........


I agree with that. Whenever my husband goes out the door we make sure we told each other I love you. We also make sure that we don't leave or go to bed angry at each other. You just never know.


Thats what I said in my post. You never know. Thats our job, never knowing one day to the next, hour to hour. Thats why family should be so important when we can make the time.


I love each day like its my last! Why do we are have to be so serious?

Tn_1__max50

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Rate This | Posted almost 7 years ago

 

My wife has never came out and said she gets worried when I go to work. I know when the pager goes off for a Swat call out she gets nervous. But she lets me do my thing with work. And when it comes to me working nights she likes it better so she can have the whole bed to herself.

Vicred_max50

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Rate This | Posted almost 7 years ago

 

Thanks for this thread. I've recently started a relationship- of sorts with a LEO. I'm actually driving to Miami in 3 weeks to meet him in person, and if things go well between us, I very well may move to the Miami area.
Aside from asking(or not asking) how his shift was, and the worry of the danger, what else should I come to expect?

TIA

Victoria

~oops~ posted this in the wrong thread.

My_oh_my_max50

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Rate This | Posted over 6 years ago

 

i'm proud of my husband and his work. he's a cop 24/7 and i appreciate what he stands for. the hardest thing we have to deal with is the difference in our work hours. as far as the danger of the job goes, i pray for his safety everyday and leave it to the Lord. God knows where my husband is at all times and if he is in danger. if he didn't come back home one day i'd be crushed. i would have lost my husband, best friend and lover...but still i trust God for his safety and try not to worry while he is at work.

Photo_user_banned_big

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Rate This | Posted over 6 years ago

 

I met my husband after he had become an Officer. I am very proud of him and would support him no matter what he did. I know that when we married he told me then that one of two things would happen...he would retire as a Police Officer or he would die as a Police Officer and if I couldn't deal with that ....it the road! LOL I gew up with lots of family as LEOs I knew I could deal with it! Yes I worry, but I don't tell him. I also trust the Lord to do in my life His Will. The Lord has never failed me yet and I don't see him ever doing that. I have met a few of the officers and I have been to the Department some. I have my Police Wives Support Group and my family to help me as well. Being a Police Wife isn't an easy job...but I love my husband.

744px-flag_of_new_mexico

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Rate This | Posted over 6 years ago

 

I am very proud of my husband he's a Sergeant now, and I know thiers more responsibility. It gets scary at times when you hear the sirens going and I get nervous I say a prayer and I wait for him to give me a call saying everything is ok. My husband knows that I will always be there to help him translate in spanish and I will be there to hold him when he needs me. My children have had their trials at their school example: my daughter at school other teenagers tell her that her Dad is ???-????,( my son), every day played with this little boy at recess and one day the little boy told him I can't play with you because your Dad is a cop, and my son came home devasted. I later found out that my husband had given his Mom a speeding ticket, and her son wasn't allowed to play with my son. My eldest daughter told that " Mom having a Dad as a police officer (people treat me different they tell me bad stuff about my Dad, it hurts my feelings. It's hard on the kids but they know that dreams do come true because their father fullfilled his dream to be a police officer.

Call_lsp_max50

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Rate This | Posted over 6 years ago

 

My fiancee supports me 100 percent in the profession I have chosen. I was a trooper before we met, so she couldn't really say anything. It is tough on the spouses though, even if they do support our endevours. Her brother is a police officer, so she isn't a stranger to law enforcement. Last friday, her brother's partner was shot by a perp at a convenient store. His vest stopped one round placed directly at his heart, but the second round grazed the top of his vest and lodged near his spine. He was able to return fire and kill his attacker, but the shooting has sparked new concerns from my future wife regarding my safety. Sometimes, we as police officers block out how dangerous our job can become.....but I promise you most of our significant others don't do that so well.

Awww_max50

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Rate This | Posted over 6 years ago

 

nadnock said:

My fiancee supports me 100 percent in the profession I have chosen. I was a trooper before we met, so she couldn't really say anything. It is tough on the spouses though, even if they do support our endevours. Her brother is a police officer, so she isn't a stranger to law enforcement. Last friday, her brother's partner was shot by a perp at a convenient store. His vest stopped one round placed directly at his heart, but the second round grazed the top of his vest and lodged near his spine. He was able to return fire and kill his attacker, but the shooting has sparked new concerns from my future wife regarding my safety. Sometimes, we as police officers block out how dangerous our job can become.....but I promise you most of our significant others don't do that so well.

Tell ur future spouse....Ive seen you at work every day.....trust me...ur safe.....


.......If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, then you will be afraid to cough !!!

870280546_m_max50

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Rate This | Posted over 6 years ago

 

BuzzKill said:

My wife and I met after I had been a police officer for four years, so she knew what she was getting before she said "I do". She worries about me alot, but not as much as she used to now that I'm in a plain clothes assignment and off of patrol.

In response to Stalker, while I don't think a wife should show up at a department and hinder an officer's performance of his duties, I do think that they are very much part of the agency. There's an old saying that "behind every good man, there's a great woman", and I think that rings true. I've given my wife a brief tour of my office, and almost all of my coworkers have met her, and we've even all hung out together off duty. I've also met the significant others of several other agents that I work with. I feel that this is an important part of being a police officer, and it bolsters morale at both the office and home, fosters a "family" atmosphere amongst coworkers, and allows the wife to get to know the guys and gals that are watching my back, so that she can rest easier at night. Just because a wife takes an interest in the job isn't a reason to label someone a "badge bunny".

AMEN!!! I think/feel that your reply was yet the most refreshing thing I have come across in here! I, being a former wife of an Officer, understand what it is really about. You are not just married to the Officer, you are married to the Badge, the Department. the Force! To separate that is unrealistic. For you to have the understanding and compassion that is equally required is honorable.

Mike_tiny_square_max50

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Rate This | Posted over 6 years ago

 

My wife and I were together before I became an officer the only thing she does not like is that I am working on holiday and know that I am a sgt I have to work on holiday so I can let my guys have it off to spend with there families she thinks because I am in charge that I should get it off not my people other then that she is alright with it

N1202178746_305955_5462_max50

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Rate This | Posted over 6 years ago

 

My wife still doesn't understand that just because I'm scheduled 8 hours doesn't mean I get to come home at the end of my shift. She also doesn't quite get that........ well you know what, there is a lot she just doesn't get but she is learning to cope.


Pain is weakness leaving the body.

Obstacles are what we see when we take our eyes off the goal.

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Rate This | Posted over 6 years ago

 

DolphinDreamin3604 said:


BuzzKill said:


My wife and I met after I had been a police officer for four years, so she knew what she was getting before she said "I do". She worries about me alot, but not as much as she used to now that I'm in a plain clothes assignment and off of patrol.

In response to Stalker, while I don't think a wife should show up at a department and hinder an officer's performance of his duties, I do think that they are very much part of the agency. There's an old saying that "behind every good man, there's a great woman", and I think that rings true. I've given my wife a brief tour of my office, and almost all of my coworkers have met her, and we've even all hung out together off duty. I've also met the significant others of several other agents that I work with. I feel that this is an important part of being a police officer, and it bolsters morale at both the office and home, fosters a "family" atmosphere amongst coworkers, and allows the wife to get to know the guys and gals that are watching my back, so that she can rest easier at night. Just because a wife takes an interest in the job isn't a reason to label someone a "badge bunny".


AMEN!!! I think/feel that your reply was yet the most refreshing thing I have come across in here! I, being a former wife of an Officer, understand what it is really about. You are not just married to the Officer, you are married to the Badge, the Department. the Force! To separate that is unrealistic. For you to have the understanding and compassion that is equally required is honorable.


I totally agree with both of you my husband has been an officer for 4 years and we have 2 young kids
i take an interest in my husbands job because he sometimes needs to talk and I am an ear he trust. I have met most of his dept and there spouses and it does help make it feel like a family. His squad and tere spouses go to dinner once a month to bond outside of work. I don't think badge bunny is a fair lable I think it is being a suportive spouse. Because knowing what he does and being some what invovled makes me feel better at night when he is out there on the street.

Policewives_max50

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Rate This | Posted almost 4 years ago

 

 I'm very proud of my husband for wanting to become a police officer. He is in the application process right now, but I know he'll make it eventually. But I wouldn't have him do anything else, even though it is a bit of a scary thought. I know it will be hard at times, but like I said; I'm proud of him for doing it.