Off Duty Forums >> Police Family Life >> Never Marry a COP!

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Never Marry a COP!

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Posted about 6 years ago

 

I took my mother in law to Lexington yesterday. She dated a cop, a Trooper to be to the point, she said that was told to her by him hundreds of times. She said that she told her kids that, but her daughter married me? Would you tell your kids the same thing, cop or not, or even tell some one that you were dating?


 


I agree with the Troooper, who passed last Christmas, that he told my mother in law to never marry a cop. There is real stress brought in to a marriage because of the job, and we do have a hi divorse rate !


What is your opinion?


I love each day like its my last! Why do we are have to be so serious?

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+17

Rated +17 | Posted about 6 years ago

 

Then where would little cops come from?

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+6

Rated +6 | Posted about 6 years ago

 

I think you should marry the person you love.  It is hard being married to a cop because of the hours involved.   Also, this is a small town and gossip makes it hard to be married to a cop.  Trust is hard when people are talking.  Still, you should marry the person you love and try to work through the problems.

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+1

Rated +1 | Posted about 6 years ago

 

bluelinedeputy says ...



I think you should marry the person you love.  It is hard being married to a cop because of the hours involved.   Also, this is a small town and gossip makes it hard to be married to a cop.  Trust is hard when people are talking.  Still, you should marry the person you love and try to work through the problems.



Good answer!


I love each day like its my last! Why do we are have to be so serious?

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+3

Rated +3 | Posted about 6 years ago

 

NOW you tell me............ten years too late.......i'll mention it to him tonight!

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+4

Rated +4 | Posted about 6 years ago

 

you should marry the one you love, even if they are a police officer. It was meant to happen for a reason. all marriages have issues, the ones that thrive are the ones that put the work into the relationship. Trust, honesty, faith, humor,and a few other things are some things that help.


 


"spirit has fifty times the strength and staying power of brawn and muscle" unknown

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+1

Rated +1 | Posted about 6 years ago

 

Cop or not if your in love marry them...(besides cops come already equipped....hehehehe)

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Rate This | Posted about 6 years ago

 

Ha ha!!, Kari your an ass!!, but if you do love them marry em!!.  I'm sure with there job schedule it'll be hard, but you can work Thru it!!

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Rate This | Posted about 6 years ago

 

PoLiCeCaR_WeEwOo says ...



Ha ha!!, Kari your an ass!!, but if you do love them marry em!!.  I'm sure with there job schedule it'll be hard, but you can work Thru it!!



Very true but I've seen a few of them work out.....

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+2

Rated +2 | Posted about 6 years ago

 

Craig that's a tough question, I want to say no don't marry one but I can't. It is up to the individuals involved. Your contributing to the divorce rate could be your injuries and feelings about it. Work through it bud.


"The hottest places in hell are reserved for those who, in times of moral crisis, do nothing." Dante

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Rate This | Posted about 6 years ago

 

As was previously said, marry who you love. I imagine at first your spouse would be really worried about you coming home or not. They would probably get somewhat used to it, but never all the way. There are always the 'what ifs' in life.


Broncos Nation

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Rate This | Posted about 6 years ago

 

I wouldn't say never.  Sometimes the job changes you if you let it, but if you love him/her why not. 

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+2

Rated +2 | Posted about 6 years ago

 

I had my wifes families support 100%. When it comes time for my little girl no one will be perfect enough in my eyes to take her away from me, cop or not.

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Rate This | Posted about 6 years ago

 

The heart wants what it wants, regardless of what is on the outside.  Although, I think sometimes being with another cop can help, since they understand more about what it is like when you are at work.

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Rate This | Posted about 6 years ago

 

I agree


I love each day like its my last! Why do we are have to be so serious?

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-11

Rated -11 | Posted about 6 years ago

 

I would agree, never, marry a cop. I married one and thought he was "different" than the rest of his department.  Affairs are not even given a second thought. Need a buddy to hold a Protection from Abuse Order for you? Not a problem. Meanwhile, my "different" Deputy and his other friends in uniform help him clean out the house right in front of me. Well, this is after his Sgt came and told him to be "good" all while a PFO is in place. No gun, tactical equipment was ever taken from him.


Gambling, another problem that runs rampant in the department. I could care less if you have a bookie or whatever but when someone steals from their family to pay for gamblingthats another story. He stole thousands of dollars. Had 2 affairs I know about and who knows how many others because of their schedule.


So, never would be an understatement.

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+1

Rated +1 | Posted about 6 years ago

 

bama72 says ...



I would agree, never, marry a cop. I married one and thought he was "different" than the rest of his department.  Affairs are not even given a second thought. Need a buddy to hold a Protection from Abuse Order for you? Not a problem. Meanwhile, my "different" Deputy and his other friends in uniform help him clean out the house right in front of me. Well, this is after his Sgt came and told him to be "good" all while a PFO is in place. No gun, tactical equipment was ever taken from him.


Gambling, another problem that runs rampant in the department. I could care less if you have a bookie or whatever but when someone steals from their family to pay for gamblingthats another story. He stole thousands of dollars. Had 2 affairs I know about and who knows how many others because of their schedule.


So, never would be an understatement.



Wow bama, don't talk to my wife please, wait, sorry, my online poker game is starting.

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Rate This | Posted about 6 years ago

 

bama72 says ...



I would agree, never, marry a cop. I married one and thought he was "different" than the rest of his department.  Affairs are not even given a second thought. Need a buddy to hold a Protection from Abuse Order for you? Not a problem. Meanwhile, my "different" Deputy and his other friends in uniform help him clean out the house right in front of me. Well, this is after his Sgt came and told him to be "good" all while a PFO is in place. No gun, tactical equipment was ever taken from him.


Gambling, another problem that runs rampant in the department. I could care less if you have a bookie or whatever but when someone steals from their family to pay for gamblingthats another story. He stole thousands of dollars. Had 2 affairs I know about and who knows how many others because of their schedule.


So, never would be an understatement.



Wow? You might wanna read the Terms Of Use.


Broncos Nation

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Rate This | Posted about 6 years ago

 

bama72 says ...



I would agree, never, marry a cop. I married one and thought he was "different" than the rest of his department.  Affairs are not even given a second thought. Need a buddy to hold a Protection from Abuse Order for you? Not a problem. Meanwhile, my "different" Deputy and his other friends in uniform help him clean out the house right in front of me. Well, this is after his Sgt came and told him to be "good" all while a PFO is in place. No gun, tactical equipment was ever taken from him.


Gambling, another problem that runs rampant in the department. I could care less if you have a bookie or whatever but when someone steals from their family to pay for gamblingthats another story. He stole thousands of dollars. Had 2 affairs I know about and who knows how many others because of their schedule.


So, never would be an understatement.



Can you tell us how you really feel Bama?


"The hottest places in hell are reserved for those who, in times of moral crisis, do nothing." Dante

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Rate This | Posted about 6 years ago

 

tgunning says ...



bama72 says ...



I would agree, never, marry a cop. I married one and thought he was "different" than the rest of his department.  Affairs are not even given a second thought. Need a buddy to hold a Protection from Abuse Order for you? Not a problem. Meanwhile, my "different" Deputy and his other friends in uniform help him clean out the house right in front of me. Well, this is after his Sgt came and told him to be "good" all while a PFO is in place. No gun, tactical equipment was ever taken from him.


Gambling, another problem that runs rampant in the department. I could care less if you have a bookie or whatever but when someone steals from their family to pay for gamblingthats another story. He stole thousands of dollars. Had 2 affairs I know about and who knows how many others because of their schedule.


So, never would be an understatement.



Wow? You might wanna read the Terms Of Use.



Uhhhhhh what he said.......


Certified wiseacre. Proudly serving since 1986.
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Shut up, listen up and put on your teflon suit!

Bring back Reagan and Patton.......

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+2

Rated +2 | Posted about 6 years ago

 

There was a time, back twenty years ago as a teenager, when I said I would never ever want to be married to a cop. I knew how hard it must be to watch him go out night after night not knowing if he would come home. Well here I am, twenty years later and I cant imagine my life any other way. I love being a LE family, even with its hardships. I know that if something ever DID happen to him, my family would be taken care of by his fellow blue. How many roofers or teachers or doctors can say that about their co workers?


Having said that, would I want my daughter to marry a cop? If he loves her enough to take care of her the way she deserves then yes. If not he better look out for that same damn family in blue who will beat the badness out of him.


Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

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+1

Rated +1 | Posted about 6 years ago

 

Hmmm, when dad and mom got married, my dad worked in the steel mill, but mom knew that my dad always wanted to be a cop, and a few years later he did it, 1968. Its a hard life at times, I have vivid memories of the two times my dad got injured on duty, stabbed once (in the calf) and slashed with a beer bottle once.(chest, before the vest)


I can honestly say mom never regreted it, she cried over it and worried, but was always proud to call herself a cops wife. Its a special breed, anyone with years of marrige in this field will agree I'm sure.


Semper Ducimus=(Always Lead)

Lead - Follow - Or get the Hell out of the way !

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Rate This | Posted about 6 years ago

 

I can barely put up with myself sometimes, why would I want to put anyone else through that?  besides I enjoy my bachelor life to much! 


"I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody. "

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Rate This | Posted about 6 years ago

 

I have heard alot of people say, "don't marry a cop" because we have the stigma of all being "man whores" (at least for the guy cops). I don't think you can say don't marry a cop because of the stresses it brings. Actually dentists have the highest occupational suicide rate, so should people shy away from them? I think it justs comes down to compatablity, love and communication. My wife is a Cardiac Nurse and is under alot of stress and then I have my job but we communicate well, and have a "date night" at least once a week where it's just me and her! We've been happily married for 5 years now!

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Rate This | Posted about 6 years ago

 

WOW Bama72 a little bitter are we? Not all are like that.

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Rate This | Posted about 6 years ago

 

Stalker975 says ...



I took my mother in law to Lexington yesterday. She dated a cop, a Trooper to be to the point, she said that was told to her by him hundreds of times. She said that she told her kids that, but her daughter married me? Would you tell your kids the same thing, cop or not, or even tell some one that you were dating?


 


I agree with the Troooper, who passed last Christmas, that he told my mother in law to never marry a cop. There is real stress brought in to a marriage because of the job, and we do have a hi divorse rate that I might soon be adding to?


What is your opinion?



I think that, like others have replied, you can't help where your heart goes. Mine has gone down the 'cop' path before, and it ended in divorce, but it had nothing to do with the job.  There are a lot of marital issues that can arise DUE to the job that may not be issues in other relationships, but if you're willing they can all be worked through. There's a lot of stress that comes with this line of work, not just LEO's but EMS/Fire personnel as well. It takes a special kind of person to do the job and it also takes a special kind of person to love and understand someone who does. I think that is why we sometimes find it easier to fall in love with someone in the same line of work that we all do, because they already understand... I could be wrong, but he asked for opinions, and that's mine  :-) 

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+1

Rated +1 | Posted about 6 years ago

 

There are plenty other professions out there that work odd hours, nurses, doctors, firemen, paramedics, flight attendants, pilots, traveling sales, ......... don't marry the profession, marry the person....It will all work out. I have been a cop for 23 years and married (to the same woman) for 22 years......it ain't easy but its good

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+1

Rated +1 | Posted about 6 years ago

 

Police_Dad says ...



I have heard alot of people say, "don't marry a cop" because we have the stigma of all being "man whores" (at least for the guys)


 


 


well for females you're either a whore or a dyke...both of which is bad for us...guys win.



Im Deputy Natalie J. and I approve this message !!!

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+3

Rated +3 | Posted about 6 years ago

 

You shouldn't date a cop if you wouldn't marry a cop....

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+1

Rated +1 | Posted about 6 years ago

 

LaDET says ...



You shouldn't date a cop if you wouldn't marry a cop....



So very true!

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