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Foolish Criminals

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Coin_max50

229 posts

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Posted over 7 years ago

 

We have all had the unique criminal that tends to bypass smirk and go right to a belly laugh or dealt with people that you say, "Man, it is a good thing that breathing and blinking are reflex actions!" Let's share with some of these "civilians" some of the funny stories. If you have one, or you see one in the paper, add the link or tell the story.

Mass. escapee caught after showng inmate ID
http://www.theunionleader.com/article.aspx?headline=Mass.+escapee+caught+after+showng+inmate+ID&articleId=c3a1dcfd-fc0e-4985-9d9f-07fbfca91ff7

Kirlian-fingerprints_max50

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Rate This | Posted over 7 years ago

 

Well I’m not an officer but I can tell you my sister in law has done some stupid things. One night she was all pissed off about her ex's girlfriend who she said seen drinking in front of her child and apparently this lady was her friend who now was sleeping with her ex as well. So She goes home in a rage puts on dark clothing a hat and grabs her bat, she goes back to her ex's house thinking she’s being all sneaky and tip toes right up to the door, what she didn’t know is there was an officer sitting in the church parking lot across the street watching every move, as she smashes out the window of the front door another officer drives by. Yes she got busted and she got busted hard... So what dose she do she calls me at 2:15 in the morning asking me to bail her out of this, so I ask to speak with the officer because I wanted to know if it was worth my time to go get her. I have to admit I have never heard an officer laugh so hard in my life; needless to say I left her at the jail for the night. Figured I would give her the night to think about what she did.


“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent”
– Eleanor Roosevelt

9-11-logo_max50

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Rate This | Posted over 7 years ago

 

Burglary suspect asleep at the wheel, but forgot to drive off

The Associated Press
Published: May 29, 2007
Last Modified: May 29, 2007 at 03:07 AM

WASILLA -- A suspect in the theft of handguns from a Wasilla home didn't get far, according to Alaska State Troopers. He was found asleep in a vehicle parked in the home's garage, wearing a sweat shirt belonging to the woman who lives in the home.

Troopers on Sunday afternoon took a call of a burglary from Lisa Siepert, 38. She reported that someone had entered her home and removed two handguns, food and alcohol. When she looked in the garage, she found a strange man behind the wheel of her neighbor's vehicle. Siepert told troopers the man was wearing her sweat shirt and that he was unresponsive.

Troopers said the suspect apparently entered the home, took the guns and broke the windshield of a pickup truck parked nearby to get inside it. The suspect then went into the garage, broke windows out of the second vehicle and fell asleep inside.

Gary Olson Jr., 20, of Anchorage, was arrested. He was charged with burglary, two counts of theft involving a weapon and two counts of criminal mischief. He was transported to Mat-Su Pretrial with bail set at $50,000.

Picture_031_max50

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Rate This | Posted over 7 years ago

 

one story sticks out in my mind, and my wife loves it. i was working 3rd. shift and about half hour or so before end of shift, we were notified of bolo "be on lookout" for such and such vehicle travelling into my jurisdiction on 4-lane, possible dui-reckless driving. i parked my cruiser at a crossover section and a little while later i observed the vehicle driving on dotted lines "center of roadway", i got behind the vehicle and observed it travel from dotted line to edge of roadway and ultimately off shoulder of roadway to the left, activated emergency equipment and finally got vehicle stopped.mind you i had overhead spot lights on and was parked behind vehicle about 10 feet looking straight inside of the vehicle. i observed the driver maneuver from driver seat to back passenger seat and then upon approaching vehicle, he was looking straight ahead like nothing happened and stated he wasn't driving.he was arrested and charged with dui and pled guilty in court.

9-11-logo_max50

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Rate This | Posted over 7 years ago

 

He must have been REALLY drunk, if he thought he could get away with that!

Bears_pix_135_max50

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Rate This | Posted over 7 years ago

 

Ithought it was funny the guy who kept throwing a brick at a plexi glass window and he would not stop because he really thought that the window would eventually break LoL

In_remembrance_of_oakland_pd_max160_max50

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Rate This | Posted over 7 years ago

 

Many years ago in Longview, TX a burglar decided to break into a wealthy family's home just before Christmas. The bad guy started ripping open all the Christmas presents and got to one that apparently thrilled him. The incipid burglar hooked up the state-of-the-art video game and started playing it on the victim's television set. Eventually fatigue overcame the idiot and he fell asleep.

When Officers responded to a neighbor's complaint that the victim's back door looked like it had been kicked in, they found the snoozing felon with the controller in his lap and his feet up on the footstool!

What a TWIT!

001_max50

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Rate This | Posted over 7 years ago

 

Okay, I have one. We had a guy who embezzelled himself a brand new Infinity from a dealership in another jurisdiction. He had paid with a $45,000 cashiers check that was apparently forged. The check looked good at the time and was verified by the bank so the dealership was not worried until about a week later when the check was returned to them as a forgery. They notified the Ventura County Sheriff who took a stolen report on the car. The really brilliant thing that dumby did was purchase a lo jack system and have it installed the day after he passed the bad check. Once the stolen went into the system, our Lo Jack units started lighting up and we had stupid in custody in about ten minutes as he was driving down the freeway.

Pamfinal_max50

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Rate This | Posted over 7 years ago

 

Those were good. Still chuckling. Thanks

Scan0001_max50

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Rate This | Posted about 7 years ago

 

We had a fella decided to rob a local liquor store. The owner gave him cash, candy, and other things he asked for. The the thief told the owner he wanted a bottle of booze off the top shelf. Fast thinking owner said no. Couldn't give it to him without an ID. Was the law you know. Braniac gave the owner his drivers license, and fled at the sound of sirens, leaving his License. They got him. Duh


'Tis better to be silent and thought a fool than to open your mouth and remove all doubt.
Trolls unite, then LEAVE THE SITE AS A GROUP.

Swat11_max50

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Rate This | Posted about 7 years ago

 

All I can say is "Job Security".

Tower_4_max50

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Rate This | Posted about 7 years ago

 

Ok I got one. I'm a corrections officer. At the institution I work at we have an individual that was trying to be a "heavy" on one of our blocks. Anyway he gets in the face of one of our Lt's. The Lt looks at him and advises him this is not the smartest course of action. The Lt. knew that he was in prison for trying to rob a 80 year old woman, and all he got was beat up by the lady before he was arrested.

9-11-logo_max50

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Rate This | Posted about 7 years ago

 

I want to be like her when I grow up!

Meangreen01_max50

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Rate This | Posted about 7 years ago

 

I was on a traffic stop as a trainee when my FTO had me search the driver. The search revealed personal use meth in a small plastic baggy. I asked the driver where he got the meth and he responded he didn't know. So, I asked him how it was possible that he didn't know. He thought about it for a minute and said, "Well officer, these aren't my pants."


"People sleep peaceably in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf." ~ George Orwell

"Honor First!"

MODERATOR #1 & PL Mentoring Team Member

100e0891___resize_max50

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Rate This | Posted about 7 years ago

 

Cops: Man buys extinguisher in drug fire. Fri Mar 9, 10:07 PM ET

CHANDLER, Ariz. - A man who started a small fire while cooking methamphetamine drove to a Wal-Mart to buy a fire extinguisher when he couldn't put out the flames, sheriff's deputies said. Jonathan Zaletel, 19, was greeted by Maricopa County deputies when he returned to his condominium late Tuesday, Lt. Paul Chagolla said.

The flames had been extinguished by a sprinkler system, and arriving firefighters found a small meth lab in the closet. A toaster being used to cook the drug had caught fire, Chagolla said, and Zalatel had tried putting it out using water and window cleaner before deciding to go buy the fire extinguisher. Zalatel was booked on suspicion of manufacturing dangerous drugs, possession of chemicals and equipment to manufacture dangerous drugs, possession of drug paraphernalia, possession of marijuana and criminal damage.

0701071541_max50

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Rate This | Posted about 7 years ago

 

on of my professors at my old college was retired nypd LT.. he was telling us a story of this stupid kid.. apparently they got a call for a bank robbery.. kid wearing blue jeans and a blue and white stripe shirt.. so they go search for the guy and find him walking down the street, wearing blue jeans and a blue and white stripe shirt, so they take him to bank teller for ID.. the teller has a smirk on her face.. she says that the kid was wearing a different blue and white stripe shirt when he robbed the bank.. so he thought that he was being smart changing his clothing..lol


Do what you love, Love what you do

English_max50

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Rate This | Posted about 7 years ago

 

http://www.boston.com/news/local/new_hampshire/articles/2007/07/08/man_disguised_as_tree_robs_bank/

*Man Disguised as tree Robs Bank*

July 8, 2007

MANCHESTER, N.H. --A weekend bank robbery involved multiple branches -- of the leafy variety. a man with tree branches duct-taped to his head and torso walked into a Citizens Bank just as it opened Saturday morning and demanded cash from a teller. Police said the disguise was the most bizarre they'd ever seen.

"He really went out on a limb," Sgt. Ernie Goodno said Sunday.

The robber, who showed no weapon, fled with an undisclosed amount of cash. Though the branches and leaves obscured much of the man's face, someone who saw images from the bank's security camera recognized the robber and called police.

James Coldwell, 49, of Manchester, was arrested at his home early Sunday morning. He was expected to be arraigned Monday.

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Rate This | Posted about 7 years ago

 

I had a DUI one night I got the h=guy out of the car and began doing field soberity. The first test i was going to have him preform was ABC's recitation. I began by asking the guy his highest grade of completion in school. The guy thought real hard for a few moments and replied.......... I'd have to say a "C".

Dscn1049_max50

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Rate This | Posted about 7 years ago

 

Burglary suspect... Homeless male broke into a female's off college campus home... he stole shampoo, a razor, and body lotion. Upon approaching the house I observed him standing in the driveway taking a shower with their garden hose using his newly aquired property... His only reply, "this stuff smells good" . He is now serving 10 years for burglary and 5 years for a previous offense in which he had a warrrant for.

Nag_max50

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Rate This | Posted about 7 years ago

 

http://www.metro.co.uk/weird/article.html?in_article_id=62320&in_page_id=2
Here's a suspect running from officers and shoots himself in the groin.

063_max50

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Rate This | Posted about 7 years ago

 

We had an armed robbery of a local pizza joint. During the investigation, the officers found a pair of gloves and a flash hood worn by firefighters behind the shop, which were worn by the perp during the robbery. During his escape they were dropped. His name was written on the items in magic marker. He was a volunteer firefighter in a neighboring town. He was also implicated in a couple of other pizza robberies.

Big_dog_pd_max50

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Rate This | Posted about 7 years ago

 

We had a drunk college who went to a glass door and thought it was his dorm when the key wouldnt work he smashed the glass in the door. He climbed in the foyer and went to sleep. He was woke up when we responded to a intrusion alarm at a bank. Kid even slept thru the audible alarm you could hear a block away

1979_max50

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Rate This | Posted about 7 years ago

 

We had a guy working a convenience store in a rough side of town during the midnight shift. This guy was really flaming gay and let everyone know he used to perform in drag in the theater in NYC. One night a real rough redneck came in and laid his 'manhood' right up there on the counter in front of him making remarks about how this gay guy should want him. Without missing a beat the gay clerk picked up a large 20oz can of vegetables and slammed it down on the suspect and then called us. The suspect was still there moaning when we arrived. I guess we could have arrested him for indecent exposure but we figured he learned a much more valuable lesson so just took him to the ER to have it stitched back up. That story spread like wildfire that night too with all the guys without knowing it walking funny. LOL!

Lake_front_max50

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Rate This | Posted about 7 years ago

 

LMAO....those are the days where ya just gotta grin !! ..........
I'm a civilian,,,, laughing with you and prayin for you !...... THANKS FOR SHARING !!!

Eagle_edited_max50

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Rate This | Posted about 7 years ago

 

I used to work at a stop and rob "convience store" and we had hired this clerk for the night shift, this clerk was retired AF who had worked on the egress systems "ejection seats". One morning I came to work to do the daily books and relieve him from work, it was winter so he went into the back to retrieve his coat. To his surprise someone had walked out with it during the night and after watching the video, they walked right past him and he never noticed his coat walking out the door. The next morning I came to work to perform the same duties as the morning before with the same clerk working the night shift. To his surprise the coat he wore to work had walked out the door during the night without him even noticing. I still say to this day he was sitting in an ejection seat and they ejected him onto his head LoL