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Ten Common Ways to NOT Get Hired

Ten Common Ways to NOT Get Hired

Sgt. Betsy Brantner Smith

You don’t really want to be a cop, do you? Fighting crime, saving lives, big guns, fast cars, a cool uniform, hot calls; that stuff’s not for you. The hours are long, the gratitude is short-lived, and there may occasionally be people trying to kill you when you’re just trying to make a living and do a little good. Take some advice from the front lines of police hiring and training, here’s ten way to make sure you do not get hired by any law enforcement agency.

10. That 20-page application they want you to fill out? Just consider that pesky document merely a guideline; they can’t possibly expect you to waste your time filling out every single box, blank, and question. Why would anyone really want a certified copy of your high school transcripts, an official duplicate of your birth certificate, and an accurate list of everywhere you’ve ever worked or lived.? Do they really need to know how to contact your grandparents, your old roommate and your college resident assistant? Just fill out what you can, you’ll have plenty of time to show them how organized and thorough you are once they bring you on board as one of their officers.

9. Don’t worry about your level of fitness. Police testing can take a long time; you may sit on an eligibility list for months, even years, before you begin the academy. So why worry about what kind of shape you’re in? Wait until you get confirmation that you’re about to start recruit training to get serious about working out, especially if you have youth on your side. You played high school football, you’re on a summer softball league, and you’re awesome at Wii boxing so you’ll get in shape in no time, right?

8. Always remember that you are owed a good police job. Don’t think that you have to work hard, prove yourself, or compete with anyone else; you are entitled to this opportunity. After all, how many people are willing to make the sacrifices you’ll have to make as a crimefighter: working shifts, facing down armed criminals, cutting your hair really short? They should feel fortunate that you’ve chosen to apply at their agency, and it’s that agency’s responsibility to make sure your career dreams are realized.

7. Make sure your social networking sites show what a fun-loving party animal you really are. The person doing your background check will certainly get a chuckle out of that picture of you passed out in front of your fraternity’s record-breaking beer can pyramid. And those racy boudoir portraits you had taken for your ex-boyfriend, the ones of you wearing nothing but a toy shoulder holster and a smile? I’m sure the chief of police will understand that it’s not your fault that your ex posted them on his My Space page after you guys broke up, complete with all of your contact information. Besides, the cops can’t actually access that stuff, can they? Can they!?

6. Why worry about your personal appearance? “Don’t judge a book by its cover,” isn’t that what your grandma always said? You’re applying to be a cop, not a Marine or a Wall Street broker. When you show up for the physical agility test, everyone is sure to love your Female Body Inspector t-shirt you bought in Cancun, or be impressed with those Victoria’s Secret PINK short shorts you just got at the mall. Besides, that scruffy Brad Pitt look or the high school Goth girl fashion statement may be just what they’re looking for in the Narcotics Unit of the agency you’re applying for.

5. Don’t bother to read anything more difficult or thought provoking than the latest issue of People magazine or your buddy’s fantasy football blog. Even though studies show that the number one predictor of success in the police academy is your level of reading comprehension, you did more than enough reading in school, and it was painfully boring then. Reading actual books interferes with your emailing, texting, Skyping, and keeping up with all that great reality TV. You’ll have no problem catching up once you’re in the academy.

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  • Photo_user_blank_big

    Anonymous

    almost 6 years ago

    I couldn't have said it better myself, RB32. Being a Policer Officer is NOT just a job, it is very much a lifestyle that you choose to live outside of the norm of everyone else. I started to prepare for this way of life when I was in Girl Scouts! But then again, it probably was because my father and uncles and cousins all served in the military after high school and then went on to become LEO's. To become a LEO it requires years of thought and years of working your way to your ultimate goal. My cousins and I all got our Criminal Justice degrees after serving, or while serving in the military before we even APPLIED to our local department. I'm just saying this was an excellent article and I hope more young people get a chance to read it so they will have some idea of what is expected from them on the job and from their lives.

  • Johnf_max50

    cheetah_speed1

    almost 6 years ago

    464 Comments

    Great Article! Sarcasm can be a good tool.. i like XBOX athlete<<lol

  • Img_0027_max50

    futurecop32

    almost 6 years ago

    50 Comments

    good point jardine51

  • Photo_user_blank_big

    scorpiochrisr

    almost 6 years ago

    10 Comments

    I want to thank whoever posted this. It is very true that many of us younger folks do not actually know what we are applying for. And who says patroll is boring? That is what I want to do when I am finally accepted into the academy and have passed everything with a 98% or better.

  • In_remembrance_of_oakland_pd_max50_max50_max50_max50_max50

    rhood

    almost 6 years ago

    23592 Comments

    This was a good article that should be handed out with every application. So many young people are clueless these days.

  • Rod_b_max50

    RB32

    almost 6 years ago

    44 Comments

    It's a reality folks. We just went through a hiring list of several hunderd applicants and unfortuneately narrowed it down to 10 in a matter of weeksfor 15 positions. People screen themselves out with the decisions they make in life.

    The points laid out in this article are reflective of various character flaws that indicate a potential for future problems. Applicants should concentrate their efforts on the opposite behavior. Law Enforcement as a culture should not, nor should it be expected to lower the standards to appise the ignorant. This is a very serious career field that is a life style, not just a job. Consider that...

  • Rod_b_max50

    RB32

    almost 6 years ago

    44 Comments

    Absolutey great article!

  • Radio2_max50

    FireDad

    almost 6 years ago

    7350 Comments

    These guys are now gone..

  • Radio2_max50

    FireDad

    almost 6 years ago

    7350 Comments

    andee82 and amituanai.. I think you guys are about done.. If you are not then send me a message...

  • Funny

    lynettesman

    almost 6 years ago

    1446 Comments

    hey I bust my balls have a clean background and good experience and I still have to fight to get in.

  • Img00212_max50

    DRKNTE

    almost 6 years ago

    30 Comments

    First if you haven't, STOP Drinking and Driving! Put some time between your mistakes (if they were) and the time you apply with someone and don't repeat the bahavior. Depending on the rest of your background and the time between your last arrest you may still be able to be selected as a good choice for employment. You do however need to learn from your mistakes sooner than the third time. <---- That was advice not a dig.

  • Photo_user_blank_big

    medrek

    almost 6 years ago

    2 Comments

    i always wanted to be a cop since i was a little kid, now i cant be one because of my convition of three dwis pls if there is anyways i can be a cop

  • Img00212_max50

    DRKNTE

    almost 6 years ago

    30 Comments

    Remember that we are brothers and sisters in this thankless profession that can cost us our lives and wallets and change our very core beings at the crap that we see and deal with everytime we show up to work and hit the road. Not to mention our co-workers trying to back stab us to get ahead. I really like the way jardine51 put it, just because Jack Nickolson raised you, and the fact you went to College makes you a good cop ( not to say it won't but from my experience I will pass if thats all you offer). You never know that little boy or girl you talk to in the motel room of that Domestic Violence scene my pull themselves out of the crap to be the best patrol, or SWAT bud you have. Oh and if you are now the person in charge don't forget how it was to actually do the job so relax and stick up for what is right and logical, oh and ask the troops what they think sometimes. I fully understand you have an obligation to make sure things are done right and I expect that from you, oh and Thanks for doing it, but don't sell your soul to the Devil. In that case go become a defense attorney or one of their investigators.

  • 2200665770_93346d5644_max50

    ceciliawallace1

    almost 6 years ago

    2 Comments

    yea sure

  • Photo_user_blank_big

    Anonymous

    almost 6 years ago

    epdofc75 what kind of comment is that toward someone that would be above you on the job!?!?! Think before you speak, this is a PROFESSIONAL Site.

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